Weird Things My Students Say – Winter Break Edition

Well we have made it to winter break and I had 5 performances last week! I also have been trying to get over being sick for about a month. We spent the month of December learning about the Nutcracker in my room and Mason and I went to the live performance last weekend!

Unfortunately we were sitting next to two very drunk people who decided it would be a good idea to go ahead and hum along to each piece.

Bad humming too.

So.. thats cool.

At this point in the year my students remind me of college students who haven’t slept in a week and might also be intoxicated. They loose the ability to know where they are or even who they are.

It’s basically an identity crisis.


Here are the BEST things I’ve heard this month – Enjoy!


The P.E. teacher and I combined classes in order to do a Nutcracker dance unit together and I asked “Why do people do dance?”

1st grader says “TO MAKE MONEY!!”



Kinder – “Ms. Hayden I have a dong too just like you.”

Me – “What are you talking about?”

Kinder  – “Ms. Hayden A DONG, A DONG, you know DONGS”

Me – “Let’s not say that word over and over.”

Later that afternoon I realized I moved my GONG and he must have meant gong.. hopefully.

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How Old Are You?

Me: “The Nutcracker was written over 100 years ago.”

1st Grader: “Ms. Hayden when do we get to listen to music we know? Not music that was written when YOU were little.”

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I looked over at two second grade boys who looked like they were about to kiss and said

“Oh boys.. what are you doing?”

Boys – “MMMMMM We’re slurping each others breath!!”


Your Melting Face

I was a bit out of breath and I bent down to zip up a coat and a student gave me a hug, another student behind her said

“I don’t want a hug I don’t want your face melting on me, today.”


Whats the Magic Word?

I should preface this with the fact that I have a stuffed cat in my room named “Gerald.” He is pretty famous around here and all the kids know him.

Kindergarten student asks me to help him color and I say “whats the magic word?”

Kindergarten – “Gerald.”

Me: “No the magic word when you ask someone to do something for you.”

Kindergarten – “Mom?”


Naked Crayons

1st Grader – “Ms. Hayden, can’t you get some crayons that aren’t naked?”

(Meaning they don’t have a wrapper)

Me: “You can use crayons with or without a wrapper.”

1st Grader – “I only like dancing naked.”

Different 1st grader – “OH SO DOES MY MOM!!”



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Happy Holidays!!


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